|
 |
American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) discourages spanking of children in order
to discipline them. It is illegal for parents to spank their child in Germany,
Sweden, Italy, Norway, Denmark, Finland, Iceland, Croatia, Latvia, Cyprus and
Austria. If that was the rule adopted all over the world then, how do you stop
your child, a year old, from experimenting with electronic gadgets? What should
you do when your 5 year old misbehaves at the party? How can you be a friend to
your teenager and get them to share their deepest secrets and fears.
|
|
Here are some ideas on how to approach children
with love and teach them discipline.
Toddlers:
For the toddlers up to the age of 3 the world is
an expedition and they want to touch, break and
see everything that they can reach up to. So,
try keeping all the electronic gadgets or
expensive things that can break, out of the
reach of children. If they still fiddle tell
them in your mama language that the things
fiddled with might hurt them or calmly say 'No'.
If this doesn't work try to distract them with
other objects, or gently carry them outside.
Remember that babies will not understand why you
hit them. They will just feel the physical pain
and this will not serve the purpose.
At the same time remember to reward your child
when he does something good, for instance, if
your child shares his toy or says thank you. The
reward can be a chocolate, ride on the bike, an
extra bedtime story or a sweet kiss. Remember to
tell the child why you are rewarding him;
appreciate him by saying very good or very sweet
this will boosts your child to continue good
behavior.
Age 3-6:
When you teach your kid to use a pencil or
colours on the book for the first time, they
would like to try it on your important files or
on the walls of your room. This is common. If
you smack them or get angry, they may not do it
at that particular time due to fear, but may try
doing it when you are not around. The best way
of punishing them is to let them clean the walls
themselves when they colour it. Keep them awake
when you are completing the file. When they look
at the amount of rework done they might change
their attitude. Try making them understand the
consequences of their misbehavior. If none work,
then punish them by not giving them anything to
write for few days. Do not give in to your child
if he starts whining or this will make him
believe that this is the right way to get what
he wants.
Some kids love playing in mud and water. They
soil their clothes and even get prone to several
diseases. Don't just tell them not to do it but
instead tell them what happens if they do it. Do
not make them feel that elders are supposed to
set the rules and younger are supposed to
follow. This will make them revolt against you
when they grow old. In a way they will try
telling you that "now listen I am old enough to
make my own set of rules"
Age 6- 12:
Earlier it was like I set the rule being an
elderly person and you follow it. Things have
changed now. Try making rules of the houses
sitting together. Discuss with him the rights
and the wrongs. After the rules are made do not
forget to reward or punish that particular act.
If you fail to do any, the child will think that
the rules are just there and never put into
practice, so he can take another chance.
It is easy to incorporate good behavior than
changing bad ones. So try building good
behaviors. Comment on his act, by telling him, "
I liked the way you helped me in the kitchen."
Communicate with your child regularly, and
encourage them to be independent.
Make good behaviors fun. Your child will listen
to you and follow them. For instance, " lets see
who cleans the chairs fast" or any thing that
will teach him to help you than being a hurdle
in your works or messing the works.
Teenager:
Parents hesitate to discuss about sex and other
relationships with their children. But kids of
this age are very curious to know anything
related to sex or dating. Before they choose a
wrong medium for all the information it is
better that you talk to them so that they don't
feel awkward, but understand that this is just
another phase of life.
See the difference later; they
will be the first ones to report to you,
anything that they learn about sex, than hide
it. Their first crush will be your bedtime
story. Do not stop them by humiliating these
feelings that are natural. Remember that even
you have passed through this same stage at one
point. Build up a friendly relationship. Make
adolescence a path to self-identity Do not beat
a teenager for they will turn aggressive when
they grow old. Remember violence is not the key
solution to stop any misact. Adolescence should
be the path for self-identity. Using force, fear
or hard punishments will make the child
resentful, fearful and dependent on force.
Experts say, that children are by nature good,
fair and honest. They imbibe qualities from
parents as they grow. So be a role model. Treat
the child with the same respect, that you want
him to treat you and others with.
|
